Forgive This!

To not forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting THEM to die!

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It is not something you do FOR someone else. It is based on the blessed possibility that your hurt will not be the final word on the matter. It challenges you to give up your self-destructive thoughts about the situation and to believe in the possibility of a better future. It builds confidence that you can survive the pain and grow from it.

Refusing to forgive by holding on to the anger, resentment and a sense of betrayal can make your own life miserable. A vindictive mind-set creates bitterness that spreads through your soul like a cancer.

Withholding forgiveness is to choose to continue to remain the victim. Remember, you always have choice. The person you have never forgiven owns you! Long after they have forgotten what they did -forgotten about YOU- ou are still thinking about them, remembering them, carrying around that baggage, weighing down your life.

Healthy love relationships are not possible without forgiveness! You cannot have a loving and rewarding relationship with anyone else, much less yourself, if you continue to hold on to things that happened in the past.

Regardless of the situation, making peace with past love partners, your parents, children, your boss or anyone who you think may have "done you wrong" is the only way to improve your chances of a "healthy" relationship with yourself or anyone else for that matter! It is not possible to truly be present and available to a new relationship until you let go of the hurt and upsets of the past.

"What?" you say! "Cut them some slack after what THEY did to me? Never!" But non-forgiveness keeps you in the struggle. Being willing to forgive can bring a sense of peace and well-being. It lifts anxiety and delivers you from depression. It can enhance your self-esteem and give you hope.

Forgive and forget is a myth. You may never completely forget, but you can choose to forgive. As life goes on, if you remember a personal injustice you once suffered, then is the time to remember that you have already forgiven. Mentally forgive again if necessary, then move forward. When we allow it, time can dull the vividness of the memory of the hurt; the memory will fade.

That is all.