Nacho Libre...

I want to see Nacho Libre. Yesterday, I was thinking about when I would go, and then I thought it would be fun to see it with some friends. It was then that I realized that I don't have any friends to hang out with anymore. I became sad. Well, not really sad like depressed or anything. More thoughtful -reflective even.
I started thinking about my friends over the years. Friendships in middle school and high school were pretty superficial. Most of those girls I never see or talk. It wasn't until I got to college that I began making, what I really consider to be friends.

It started out with Bob and me and that was cool. Then his friend Tony joined in.
I was also hanging out with my girls Nikki and Tammy.
Brian, Sean and James were around and they added to the fun.
Amanda, Bob’s girl, added an interesting dynamic –I won’t go into that.
Tamika, Tony’s girl, was a Jersey girl, but she hung with us from time to time.
Even my sister played a part.
In the beginning, my sister, Tammy and I were the only ones who had kids (we each had one). Most of us were in college, commuting, and living with our parents to save money. We had some great times, stupid times, crazy times, lots of hook ups and break downs, you know the drill.

Then slowly, everyone started moving on.
James was always at Drexel, plus he had a girlfriend who wasn't part of our set.
Bob and Amanda broke up, so she faded away.
Tony and Tamika moved to Penn State's main campus.
Brian got a place in the city, then went missing; still don’t know what happened to him.
Nikki got wifed up and had a baby.
Tammy joined the Navy. She and I are still close. Well, as close as you can be with someone who lives 5 time zones away.
My sister got married and had another baby, so her focus and priorities all changed of course.
Bob joined Tony and Tamika up at U Park. He and I were on the outs for a while, but we got it back and still maintain contact via phone and e-mail.
Finally, Sean followed Bob up to U Park and that was that.

I transferred to Temple and met Donald who was attending Cheyney. He had a son near my son's age. We fell in love and all that, so for a while it was me, Donald, Nikki and her man Jeff. Good times.
Then Donald and I broke up (tear), and Nikki and Jeff’s relationship started going crazy.
I stayed tight with Nikki, and then her cousin Samantha and I became close. The 3 of us had some ridiculous adventures, cutting up all over the tri-state area in my Escort, acting like fools. I must have smoked about 1,000 cigarettes. Sadly, Nikki started a downward spiral, I won’t bother with those details, and Samantha went all Dykadelic on me, got her own wife and set out raising their "nontraditional" family. Weirdness.

Mostly these days it’s just me. I’m getting older; a boyfriend/husband will be nice someday soon, but that won't replace regular old friends. People who make you laugh and you can just hang with and be stupid with, no romantic pressure no pretense. I miss that. I figure even after I'm married there will come a point when he and I get sick of being up under each other and want some time apart. I would like to have a life outside of my marriage.

I still have my sisters, though they each operate at levels of dysfunction that swing from mild neurosis to extreme psychosis.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not lonely, and I still enjoy life, whatever it may bring. There are just times I wish I had a homey nearby I could call and say, "Hey, lets go see Nacho Libre."

That is all.